Life is funny.

 Life is funny sometimes.

Motherhood is funny.

There are stages that each child goes through, and I think we are given something to love and hate about each stage.  You know, so we can enjoy it but still be ready to move on when it is over.  

Newborns are so sweet, cuddly, beautiful, and perfect.  They don't smack their siblings or sass their parents.  They are incredibly needy, but sometimes that is endearing.  But they get up throughout the night, you can't distract them from their crying, and you have to pack everything but the kitchen sink in the diaper bag to leave the house.  Not to mention you may have to change 3 times to avoid spit up stains.

Toddlers are funny.  The little personality begins to emerge and you watch in rapture as they hit their milestones.  You clap and cheer when they say a new word or do a funny trick.  They are still cuddly and needy, but not nearly as much.  They can feed themselves, talk, they sleep (more), and there are no more bottles to wash.  But there are days that you get them into bed and fall onto the couch in an exhausted stupor only to squint and discover crayon on the wall or poptart crumbs in your bed.  There will be times they will paint the floor with a bottle of your lotion or leave a mural with a tube of lipstick.  And you will swear to kill the person who thought up that singing purple dinosaur we all love to hate. 

Then they start preschool.  They grow more independent and you realize you no longer have a baby.  There are no more diapers to change!!!  You sniffle on the first day of school as you watch the little backpack round the corner, but there are other days that school can't start soon enough.  They are adorable and funny, but challenging.  They will say things that embarrass you to death.  They have minds and wills of their own.  You better make sure you have their favorite cup clean at all times, and they really like to wear polkadots, stripes, neons, checkered print, and glittery tie-dye rainbows in the same outfit.  You'll get calls from the teacher, they'll have to apologize to other children, and you'll have to listen to Taylor Swift sing the same song 47 times in a row until you hide the CD out of desperation to keep your sanity.

And then they'll start Kindergarten.  They'll be gone all day and you'll wonder why 8-2 seems like forever and how they got so grown up.  They'll come home with homework and shock you at how quickly they learn.  They'll catch a bus, buy a lunch, and remember special events.  You'll smile when you hear stories of the day and grimace when you hear about the boy on the bus that likes her.  You'll love sleeping through the night but hate how you have to repeat things 87 times to get them done.  You'll enjoy having full-sentence conversations and fun parent-child dates, but you'll want to pull your hair out when they argue with everything.  You'll wonder why you thought life would get simpler when they went to school now that you have PTA meetings, ball games, homework, library books, and snack schedules to keep up with.

You'll find yourself sitting on the sidelines of a soccer field, freezing as the sun sets.  You'll be thinking about all that you have left to do, and you'll realize that you can't wait until the season is over so that you don't have to spend the evenings shuttling your child back and forth to the field, washing a uniform, and bundling up a toddler.  You'll be glad you don't have to juggle cheering for one child and keeping the other off of the field.  But then your child will run past, turn around, find you in the crowd, and give you a thumbs up.  And you'll realize that in what sometimes feels like forever.. but really is no time at all... that she won't be looking for your approval at all.  That she will be independent, grown-up, and gone.  And you'll be glad that you spend your evenings exhausted with an empty wallet, cheering on a team of six little kids that aren't even sure which end of the field they are supposed to be running towards... and keep asking if they are done yet so they can go eat dinner.  Because that, my friends, is where life happens.